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The Cruise Lady: Cruise Ship Balcony No-No's

Updated 257 days ago

Just because you booked a balcony room does not mean that the balcony is PRIVATE!   Far from it!

You are a part of a community of balconies – that means YOU HAVE NEIGHBORS!  Using good common sense can save a lot of grief both for you and for them.

Don’t smoke!  Lorraine knows you would like nothing better than to light-up along with your morning coffee – or afternoon cocktail, but DON’T!  First of all, it could cost you MUCHO DINERO should you get caught (yes, cruise lines do impose a hefty fine for breaking this rule) but it can also make you a pariah among your neighbors.  In fact, once (while it was still okay) Lorraine’s neighbor emptied an entire can of room spray over the divider.  Had she simply asked, Lorraine would have been more that willing to refrain from lighting-up while said neighbor was outside.  TOO LATE NOW!

No sex!  Enjoy all you want INSIDE your cabin – but not outside on your balcony.  Remember, it’s NOT PRIVATE!  You could end up starring in the next “viral video!”  

Cut the loud music!  Not everyone likes the same genre – plus why would you want to destroy the peace and quiet of others!  You want loud music?  GO TO THE POOL DECK!

Don’t roughhouse!  Have fun using your balcony but keep the foolishness down!  This means not standing or climbing on furniture or railings.  Stuff happens – and the water is does not provide a soft landing!

Don’t throw things overboard!  Cruise lines have strict rules against this.  Besides having a negative influence on the environment – it can also be dangerous to fellow-cruisers on lower decks.  

Don’t hang clothes outside!  Draping wet swimsuits over balcony furniture may seem like a good idea until your bikini becomes a one-piece thanks to an unexpected gust of wind.

Do not leave the balcony door open!  Doing so not only messes with the ship’s air conditioning system, but it can create the “mother of all air tunnels” should you open your hallway door.  A gentleman left his right thumb in the cabin door-jamb after being caught in one of these.

Finally, please do not leave your balcony outdoor light on all night!  Not only does it waste electricity, but it can also drown-out the view of the night sky – which is beautiful - the moon reflecting on the water is a lovely way to be lulled to sleep.

Common courtesy is definitely not a “no-no” – in fact practicing its use can make the cruise more enjoyable not only for your neighbors, but for you as well.

Article written by Lorraine Highseas

Certified cruisaholic who’s sole purpose is to help you enjoy one of life’s greatest things to its fullest. Check out her Facebook page by clicking here.

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